Let's stand up for her......

It's 2013. A new year filled with new hopes, new aspirations, new goals and of course resolutions which we tend to break at the drop of a hat. However, this year is different.

The brutal gang rape and murder of the innocent 23 year old girl in Delhi reflects our society's actual state. Sexual assault on women at workplace, schools, private vehicles, public transports, roads and almost all possible places shows the carelessness of not just our Government but of us as well. Most of the time a woman has to deal with eve-teasers all by herself as we merely spectate the whole scenario without uttering a word in her support.

What do we, as the responsible members of this society, do when we watch a woman being sexually harassed in a public transport? Do we stand up for her or leave her on her own as if we do not care? What if back home our sister or mother or wife or daughter narrate a painfully helpless situation to us about the kind of humiliation and assault they were subjected to by their co-worker or a roadside romeo? How would we feel if we happen to know that absolutely no one raised their voice against this shameful act? I don't see a reason for us to feel bad as we din't raise our voice either when someone else's sister/mother/wife/daughter was being eve-teased.

I happen to recall an incident which happened a few months ago wherein some bastard on a bicycle hit my Mom hard on her bum as he rode away. My Mom shouted at the top of her voice running behind him and asking people to catch hold of him. No one did anything and that jerk, despite being on a bicycle, escaped. Such is our society. And so are we. We love being spectators.

Instead of taking resolutions like quitting smoking or drinking or any such resolution which we know we will never follow, let's take an oath to raise our voice against any offense that we witness. Let's promise to safeguard a woman's self respect by being by her side even if she's a stranger. Let's resolute to stand up for a woman in need and object any kind of obscene behavior and lewd comments passed at her.

Let's not let some insane sadists take away a woman's innocence and self respect and leave her only to be humiliated by the society till she lives.

Is this hard to do?

Picture Courtesy: Click here

Delhi - A Woman's Nightmare

More than 500 rapes (reported) in our so-called capital city in 2012. Where is our country heading to? Sexual assault, domestic violence, eve teasing, torture, what else should we women go through? What do these assholes have in their minds when they put women through such gruesome torture? If going out in the night after 8:00 PM means I am not coming back in one piece, then I do not want to go out at all! If despite such gruesome act the criminals are acquitted, then why is there even a law in our country? If that innocent girl would not have boarded that bus, some other girl might have. It could have been anyone. Someone as young as 16 or as old as 30. It could have been anyone. That very thought scares the hell out of me.

What possibly could be a rapist's state of mind? Do they enjoy it? Do they like it when a woman begs for mercy? Do they feel it's their birth right to sexually assault any woman they want? Where do they get such courage from? We all know the answer. It lies in our weak law and order. The endless court trials which eventually bury the truth and silence the victim. The doubt on a woman's character when she screams out loud that she was raped. The questions and humiliation she is subjected to by the police as if they doubt her statements.  The poor male-female sex ratio. When a woman is raped, there is every possibility that she won't be accepted in the society with the same dignity she held earlier. Why is that not the case with the rapists? Why ain't they looked down upon?

Will the rapists get away without being punished like always? If they are indeed punished, will it be just jail for a few years? Is 7 years of jail the enough for a crime as grave as rape?

If a woman is this unsafe in our country's capital, then I dare not ever put my foot there. I always knew Delhi is unsafe for women but I never heard of such a gruesome incident before. High in crime rate especially against women, why doesn't the police ensure maximum security is provided? Crimes happen in Delhi even in broad daylight and go unnoticed. Lewd comments are passed on the fairer sex in public transports like buses and people keep quiet. It's said that "Dilli dilwalon ka shehar hai". Sahi mein?

Delhi indeed is India's Rape Capital in true sense!

Born a Woman - Curse or Boon?

Incident 1: She used to take the same route daily as that was the only road that led to her home. He, along with his gang, would be at the same place as always, waiting for her to pass. His stare caused her so much discomfort which only a woman could understand. The nasty comments lowered her confidence but she din't know whom she should discuss this with. She was too scared to show them what she feels as an unknown fear haunted her...

Incident 2: He used to come regularly to her home as he was quite close to her family. She called him uncle & jumped on his lap whenever he came. He always used to get her Chocolates, toys etc which she obviously loved. She never knew the real intentions behind his friendly gesture as she was an innocent child. Her parents never noticed too as they thought he's just being friendly. He would touch her at wrong places, kiss her unnecessarily. As she grew up she became aware of her own body & the discomfort in a man touching her. She began keeping a fair distance from him. She never discussed these things with her parents as she din't know how she would be received.

Every woman in this world must have been through similar incidents atleast once in her lifetime. The feeling of helplessness, fear, anger & unsure-ness of how she will be received if she discuses this with a loved one stops a woman from seeking help.  In this male-dominant society (yes it is still male-dominant), a woman is held responsible if she is eve-teased. Some maniac politician (can't recollect his name) claimed that a woman who is covered has less risk of being attacked than a woman whose skimpily dressed. I had like to disagree with his statement as if that was the case, any women whose "decently" dressed wouldn't be ever eve-teased or raped.

It is hardly possible for a man to understand how a woman feels when she is eve-teased or sexually abused. Be it school, work place, tuition or even her own home, she is always at the risk of being sexually abused. And it's not always strangers but she's also attacked by men/boys whom she trusts.

She is the one whose bordered with rules & regulations all throughout her life. She's the one looked down when a man molests her. Why her? Ain't regulations supposed to be for men as well? A lot of times a woman is asked to keep mum if she's raped. The family feels that if things are revealed to the society, she can never be married. Will these things ever change?

With our law being so weak, these bastards get away quite easily. Education plays a vital role in making sure our girls are safe. A girl should be taught to report any suspicious acts in and around her for her own security. She should report to her parents if any stranger or friends/family member touches her at inappropriate places. Child abuse should never be hidden as in future things can become fatal.  She should intimate her parents about nasty comments passed at her by a road side romeo. She should also be taught to raise her voice against such men so to let them them she isn't a sissy and she can stand up for herself when the need arises.

Martial Arts, Self defense training should be a compulsory subject in out not so great education system. Instead of feeling helpless when a man attacks, a woman should be able to fight back to protect her self esteem. There's no point in being a damsel-in-distress as no super hero would come to the rescue when the need arises.

Fight Back!